Motivation Monday: Grief Is Rarely a Straight Line

There’s a common misconception that healing happens in a neat, orderly progression. We think that with enough time, our sadness will gradually fade until one day it’s simply gone.

But grief doesn’t work that way.

It’s more like walking through the woods on a winding trail. Some days the sun is shining, the path feels easy, and you realize you’ve gone hours without thinking about your loss. Then, seemingly out of nowhere, you round a corner and find yourself overwhelmed by memories and emotion.

That happened to me recently.

I lost my mom five years ago and my dad four years ago. Most days, I can smile when I think of them and be grateful for the time we shared. But just the other day, I was hit with a wave of sadness because I missed my mom so much. I found myself thinking about our daily phone conversations—the little chats that seemed so ordinary at the time but now feel incredibly precious.

For a moment, it caught me off guard. Shouldn’t I be "past this" by now?

The answer is no.

Love leaves an imprint on our hearts, and when someone who mattered deeply is gone, it’s natural for those feelings to resurface. An anniversary, a song on the radio, a familiar recipe, or even an ordinary Tuesday can bring back emotions you thought had settled.

If you're experiencing something similar, give yourself grace.

Don’t measure your healing by the number of tears you shed or the number of days since your loss. Grief isn’t a test you pass. It isn’t a staircase where each step takes you farther away from the pain. It’s a journey with unexpected turns, and that's completely normal.

The beautiful thing is that those moments of sadness exist because of the depth of the love that came before them. They remind us that the relationship mattered.

So today, if grief catches you by surprise, be kind to yourself. Pause. Remember. Cry if you need to. Smile at the memories. Talk about the person you miss.

And know that taking a step backward emotionally doesn’t mean you’ve stopped healing. It simply means your heart is remembering someone who helped shape your life.

As always, be patient with yourself and with others. We never know what someone else is carrying—or when an old wound might suddenly feel new again.

"Healing isn't forgetting. It's learning to carry love and loss together, one day at a time."